Bobby Cruz Wedding
Well, have to say this has been another very interesting week and pretty unusual weekend.
I was in Bobby Cruz's wedding yesterday. I have not been in a wedding since I was a kid and I am pretty old these days. I play weddings all the time, from the musician view and experience, and often not knowing the people at all that are getting married. Yesterday was different.
Bobby and Suzanne were on a trio gig I booked before they started dating. I know Bobby had met her before that gig, but did notice Bobby was checking her out a lot, loved her playing and singing, and seemed to be interested a little beyond the musical aspects of this drummer.
Well, yesterday they tied the knot. It was a hot California day and I was in a real tux! Musicians don't seem to own a real tux at my age. It is really a black suit with a tux shirt and bow tie; not a real tux. I can't remember the last time I was in a real tux. Dang the real stuff is nice! But I digress.
All I can say about the day is wow. Dang it is beautiful to see 2 people that seem to have broke the odds and found a life mate that they truly love. I found the most interesting thing hearing her say her vows. It made me long for the quality of person that could say make that kind of commitment, really meaning it with all their heart. Both times Suzanne spoke, I felt the tears well up. It was such a blessing to watch, one of my very best friends in the world receive a love and commitment like that. It was also a sad moment since these words have had short lived impact in my personal experience and would never be heard at this point in my life. Of course, I hope that can change, and circumstance would say it already has in many ways.
The point is, I am overwhelmed with the ability to do this wedding thing. To be able to stand in front of your world and say these things. To be able to stand in front of your love and hear those things. Beautiful and Sad for me. I was blessed to see what love looks like and wish Bobby and Suzzane a blessed and beautiful life!! Thanks for allowing me to share it and participate in an amazing event!
Picture from rehearsal day - Photo by Victor at Silver Line
Love you guys,
Greg
Wishing Bobby and Suzanne much blessings and happiness in sharing their lives together.
Roy & Louise van Broekhuizen
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Nice tribute to your friends, I like your honesty and wish the best for you.
Marisa
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Marisa,
Thanks for your words of encouragement and sharing. I so appreciate the friends I have met online that are truly good people and you are one of them.
Bobby called this morning and told me he read the blog and thought it was awesome. He told me, "Don't take it down until I get a chance to get back and copy it!" I told him it was here for life.
I am blessed by so many amazing people. I have been realizing that again as of late.
Honesty - the only policy. The question seems to be, in our culture, when is it appropriate? My heart says always. I guess I am just one of those weird artist, mushy types, but I don't know any other way to do it. I guess the pain of others lies have burned in the need to not participate in that process for people I care about (and trickled into the blog space too).
Thanks again for posting and being one of the special people out there!
Blessings,
Greg Vail Sax
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Thanks Greg,
I consider you an online friend too! As far as honesty is concerned, I'm with you......I think always is the best way to go. I don't like to mislead people and I'm a terrible liar anyway so, it works for me.
After a long day at work, it was nice to come home and see your post.
Take Care,
Marisa
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So glad to be a part of the good part of someones day!
Thanks,
greg
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Hi Greg,
I understand where you are coming from when it comes to this wedding stuff. Its so great to see two people in love committing their lives to each other. Its also tough for those of us who have had it and lost it. I choose to look at it this way: I am grateful to have had the gift at all and I hold on to that fact and it helps to get me through.
I also wanted to mention that I saw your post about Ben and I hope its Ok that I post this here. I want you to know that you both are in my prayers and I am praying that God has led you to a doctor that can give you answers and will heal him so he can live a long productive life where he can serve God for the purposes He wants.
Heart issues have touched my life two times over the years. Once with my dad and once with my former husband and I unfortunatly, have too much experience with it. UCLA is an awesome place for this and I am sure if anyone can fix it, they can. Hoag also has a great bunch of cardiologists and if you ever need a recommendation, please dont hesitate to ask me.
Anyway, hang in there and know you have a lot of prayers behind you and your son.
Take care,
Mary
PS I am just loving the hair! It makes you look 10 years younger!
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Mary,
You do get it. For me it was extra weird because I am at weddings all the time of people I don't know, being a musician. this was the first one I attended in forever and first one I was in, in decades?
One of my best friends in the whole world is also one of the luckiest people I have ever known.
I think that there relationship caused issues for me from the very beginning. You feel like you are so in love with someone, and then see love from the third party experience in another; it can make you look hard at yourself and your definitions on things.
Watching Bobby and Suzanne light up, care, want, love, desire, enhance, bless and support each other, and then looking at my world realizing I did not have any of this was very sad. What we settle for, in hopes of finding love is often sooooo wrong.
But I digress.
Thanks!
Ben is so blessed to have so many praying for him and loving on him. I have nearly 100 comments, emails, posts etc... of support and concern over the past week. How cool is that!
God is good and will be tomorrow and the day after that too. Ben will be fine cuz he's in good hands, and the doctors are really great this time too!
Thanks again for your caring and sharing,
Greg Vail Sax
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Greg,
I was just laying there trying to fall asleep after a really long day and going through my mental rolodex and decided sleep wasnt coming any time soon and so here I am writing what I was thinking about.
As I mentioned before I had true love and lost it. I know exactly what I have been searching for because I once had it. For me it looks like this: True love is being able to look in their eyes from across a crowded room and knowing exactly what they are thinking and they know what you are thinking. Its a deep connection. It may sound like a movie, but its not. I had it and I know without any doubt that I did. It is knowing he or she is your best friend and you can go to them feeling 100% safe with whatever is going on in your life. They are your safe place to fall. These days my safe place to fall is my bed and its not all that safe when I sometimes land on the remote!
Its truely caring and its sharing your inner most hurts, disappointments and desires. Its knowing you can say the craziest things and that person will just get it and even sometimes will finish your thought or sentence for you. There is no competition between you, only a true desire for supporting them in their goals and dreams and helping them achieve them. Its complete commitment and going to the mat when the going gets tough. It is also knowing they , too, will go to the mat. Its celebrating your differences and allowing the other person to spread their wings and soar. The butterflies in the stomach dont last. Those fade away and eventually, the deep love takes its place and its way more then those early giddy feelings. Its making each other laugh, its dropping everything and going to that person when the stuff hits the fan. Its being vulnerable and open and honest and being true to yourself because only through that can you give another what they deserve. That being your whole self.
I believe this, Greg. I believe that God has someone for everyone. I had my someone and I lost him. Do I think its possible there is another someone out there for me? Sure I do, because I believe all things are possible with God. Will I slam doors and close myself off? No, because I could be slamming a door on God's will for me. I am going to remain open and willing and maybe, just maybe, I will be blessed again. Its a tall order, but if I am worthy and God wants it for me, then I will take it gratefully and take much better care of it. Sometimes, the person we are meant to be with is right in front of us. Sometimes, time has to pass, circumstances have to be straightened out before they can be with us. Sometimes, we need to remember its in His time and not ours.
Ok, now I think I can sleep. Thanks, I needed that!
God bless~
Mary
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Mary, sounds like you have a good handle on the real issues with a hopeful look for the future. That would be a pretty ideal position to have.
The unfortunate thing is when you sell yourself short for a love that is not all you state above, and then still have to morn the death of a love that you realize was fictional and shallow.
It's almost like the thing you morn is the fantasy of what you thought you had, since the reality is really not worth morning at all.
Funny thing is, it still is the same process, either way; and still hurts the same too....
Thanks fr sharing from a better, healthier space than I could,
greg
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